5 Life Lessons

I hope you like this picture. I do. And I can’t wait to get up there in the sky.  Now before you hit delete, this isn’t some la-de-da newsletter today about looking at life from the clouds, or how small we are when we are up there, oh no. Not today.  Today this is a literal figure of speech when I say ‘I want to be up in the sky’,  I like, really mean it.  Why? Because I’m currently writing this newsletter from a tiny little airport in Spain where my plane was scheduled for 10am. I got up at a 5am to make this flight.  We boarded the plane, sat on it for two hours whilst the pilots tried to sort out a ‘technical fault’ only to be told we had to then disembark the plane and wait….and wait…and it’s 7 hours later and I’m still, waiting…
This is therefore the perfect time to write about my top 5 life lessons that get me through times like this, effortlessly.
I want you to know I am not perfect.  I have learnt these lessons the (very) hard way by going about situations like this backwards I had to learn how to view life from a much happier perspective.
So whilst the very knowledgeable pilots are fixing the plane, I have the perfect opportunity to share with you my top 5 tips to take anything life throws at you…

1.  If it’s out of my control, I have to let it go.  Well the thing is, I don’t ‘have’ to let it go, I mean I could get angry, frustrated and all stressed out but it wouldn’t ‘change’ anything. So by letting it go it means I go with the flow of life, I accept what I cannot control and instead, find a really cool way of thinking about it.  Stress doesn’t go with my outfit.

2. I always get to choose how I feel.  See point 1 above about anger, frustration and stress – well that’s a choice. And it’s not a very good one. Because the thing about those feelings is they are heavy and make you feel like crap. And the worst thing of all is there is no one else to blame when you feel them, except yourself. Whats the point in that?

3. I have to get my head right.The only way to choose the right feelings as per point 2 above, is to get the right thoughts in my head.  I can’t choose a negative thought and get a positive feeling, it just doesn’t work that way. So I have to start thinking about what I am thinking about.   If I think ‘This flight delay has totally ruined my whole day’ then it is likely I will start to feel annoyed, act in a way that isn’t very kind or forthcoming and the outcome would be to ruin my own day.  You see I can’t blame Easyjet (!).  So instead I have to think right.  I started to think ‘OK, I’ve just been given 7 hours of time.  Seriously 7 whole hours. Given to me. Just like that. I can write newsletters, update my website and do all the things I’ve been meaning to do whenever I could just grab some ‘free time’ et voilla’! This made me feel quite excited and in turn I’ve been working like a demon and Im get a tonne of stuff done. That wouldn’t have happened if I was ‘blaming Easyjet’…..

4. Am I working from the ‘facts’ or what I think is right?  I know this sounds like a totally crazy thing to tell yourself but actually it separates the men from the boys when it comes to mind management.  So much of our time is wasted on what we think is happening, what we think others are meaning, what we think is really going on, what we think that person really meant etc., and yet when we stop, break it down and look at it, a lot of the time all these thoughts are just that; thoughts.  In other words the thoughts we have are not always, facts.  One of my biggest lessons was to check that the thoughts I had going on were factual. It made a huge difference to my peace of mind.  So the next time you might be waiting for someone to say, phone you back, don’t jump to conclusions and lies about why they haven’t done so within your time frame,  ask yourself what the fact is (simply that this person hasn’t called back  just yet) and then realize how simple that can be without adding all the crazy thoughts you want to attach to it. Always get your facts right. It feels a lot better.

5. HALT.  This was one of the big ones for me back in the day of getting emotionally well.  HALT stands for hungry, angry, lonely or tired.  If you find yourself feeling any one of these, act on it and act fast!!  The H is for hungry the obvious thing to do is to feed yourself.  Sounds so simple but when you work long hours and get stuck in meetings, being hungry can lead to all sorts of mad behavior.  Be conscious of this. A is for Angry a very explosive emotion and if you feel like this then talk to someone or write things down. Anger can be sadness covered up so start to take care of yourself and ask yourself some really honest questions about why  you are feeling this way.  L is for lonely and this can always be eased by talking to someone you love, keeping mentally busy and another amazing way to feel less lonely is to help others. T is for tired, and if you feel tired the best thing to do is simply to put yourself to bed. These are simple self care tips for some strong feelings that can become out of hand when ignored.  Ultimately I want for you to never ignore yourself and always treat yourself like you would someone you love.

I hope these 5 tips have been of interest and help for you.  And yes, I’m still waiting to board and hopefully by the time this blog goes out on Friday (it’s currently Monday) I should be back in London…
Happy Friday lovely readers.